by Thomas L. Traband III
Life sucks.
Well, not really, but it looked like a good opening sentence for my first column.
Now then, life may not suck, but it isn't all peaches and cream. My reader, if he is patient, may be wondering why I say this.
I sit in seat 22B on Northwest Airlines flight 011 to Seoul. [The plane is a 747 with an unbelievable ten seats across a row. I'm amazed.] We're somewhere between Alaska and Tokyo. I saw mountains for the first time along with the Alaskan coastline.
How do I dare not enjoy life? I'm going to Korea for twelve months and don't know where I'm going. Not only that, but I'll be sixteen hours ahead of the good old Eastern Standard Time zone. I can imagine the things I'll miss.
Let's take a step inside my mind and see what I think I'll miss...
1.- Bullets basketball games. Yes, I know they keep losing, but at least there was one game in town.
2.- Redskins games. With the addition of Wilbur Marshall, we can expect another good year. I missed one season because of Basic Training and now I stand to miss another. The Redskins are the greatest team in the league.
3.- Affluence. Surprised? I know I complain constantly about everyone's BMW, but it beats poverty. I'll take two dozen yellow ties over an ox any day.
4.- Traffic. The presence of all those people was comforting. Seoul boasts 11 million citizens to D.C.'s 1 million. I don't expect to spend much time down in Seoul, however.
5.- Computers. I hate them. Still, they can be quite useful. I appreciate their contribution to writing. I possess poor handwriting. The computer cleans it up and saves my words forever.
6.- Idyllic Springfield. One doesn't leave paradise and not miss it.
7.- Otherworldly Oakton. Nestled comfortably between Friendly Fairfax and Vivacious Vienna, Oakton is frequently confused with being a suburb of Vienna. I only know four people who live there and I suspect the other residents of being movie extras.
8.- The Don & Mike Show. Irreverency is too often lacking in our society. Too many people need their comeuppance. Don & Mike provide that service expertly.
9.- Glenn Brenner and “Wienie of the Week”. ‘No good deed goes unpunished.’ Unfortunately, too many tasteless comments, obnoxious behavior and poor judgements do. The death penalty is too severe (usually), but a good slap on the wrist by a wet noodle works to bring such incidents to public attention. A marvelous show.
3/25/88
Here I am at Camp Greaves. The DMZ is less than 2 miles thataway. It's cool, because you always have music. North Korea plays “inspirational” music over large speakers to their troops. The camp is nice, and has all the modern amenities except women. We are restricted to the north side of the Freedom Bridge. One is eligible for three passes per week. I'm told that a pass is easy to get because most guys will spend all their money on one night. I just won't do that.
The Freedom Bridge is a one-lane bridge which spans the Imjin River. On the north bank is Camp Greaves, on the south side is the highway leading to Seoul. At the south base of the bridge, one finds a tourist mall. It contains shops, restaurants, etc. It's like a town with no residents. It's a new structure.
Up the street, one will discover Camp Bonaface, the U.N. camp. Also, there is Camp Liberty Bell, our northernmost camp. Further up lies Panmunjom. This town sits on the border. The truce-signing room, with it's demarcation line, is a popular tourist stop.
We have a PX, enlisted men's club, bowling alley, Rec center, gym, theatre, swimming pool, basketball/tennis court. The 3-4 man rooms have locking doors and private bathrooms. One can easily live here.
I'm told we go to the field frequently, but only for 2-3 days at a time. We spend a lot of time on PT and training for the Expert Infantryman's Badge. The criteria, I believe, are perfect scores on the PT test, a forced road march and something else that I can't remember.
Supposedly, we do enough activities that we don't realize the passage of time. We are eligible, also, for a half-time leave. We can take leave between our fourth and seventh months. Perhaps a Hawaiian vacation in October would be worthwhile. It would be cheaper to get to than the continental U.S.
It's only twelve months, though. It will be over before I know it.
4/1/88
The Army has a program called KATUSA. That stands for Korean Augmentation To the U.S. Army. [Young Korean men are subject to a 2 1/2 year draft] KATUSA soldiers are attached to a U.S. unit. They train, eat, sleep, and socialize with U.S. soldiers. They are subject to our chain of command, and, in the case of most NCOs and officers, part of it. The Korean government pays them $5.00 plus 30 free packs of cigarettes per month. The KATUSA soldiers are all college students and must speak some English.
I spoke with a KATUSA private who is in our unit. He is in 1st squad of our weapons platoon, thus making him a mortar man. He is 25 years old and has been in the Republic of Korea Army for about four months, and a part of our unit for three weeks. He studied law at the university for two years. His hometown is Han-ju. He has been taking English for seven years, and reads it well, but speaks it poorly. He also had three years of German instruction. He doesn't like being in the army, and only likes eggs, bacon and juice among American foods.
This young Korean student and soldier believes that in five years or so, the ROK will grow enough economically and in population so as to be capable of defending itself against North Korea. He sees the ROK as being too big and strong for North Korea to attack. He also accepts North Korea as a separate country. I believe he doesn't expect or want North and South Korea to reunite. His future is with the ROK.
4/4/88